That’s what I said in reply to the email I received from my father.

After a couple years of petty silence, I received this in my email:

Hello Jacqui:
I have been following you through Harley in Wonderland.  It hasn’t always been easy watching and reading; once a parent, always a parent.  I was wondering if you would be amenable to including any of your family members (i.e. Me, Mother and Gabe) in visitations at CFSA with your kids?  Thank you.
First off…..  If he’s been following me then he knows about the hell I was going through with Mr. J.  He knows about my being homeless and hungry and struggling.  He knows that I need help, but he has made no effort to apologize for punishing me for simply being a victim of domestic violence and suffering from severe Stockholm Syndrome.
And yet he couldn’t be bothered to contact me sooner.  To say he’s sorry I’ve been going through that.  No offer of moral support.  Nothing.
But he has no problem saying, “I wanna see the kids.”
No.  That’s not what my children are going to learn about family from me.  Family will be there for you through good times and bad.  They will forgive you the same as you forgive them.  They won’t let feelings, money, distance, religious differences, nothing stand in the way of being there for you in any way they can.  And respectful people will respect your parents the same way you’re supposed to respect them and not just act like they couldn’t care less about them but they care only about you.  And the same goes in reverse.  There’s no way a good parent would stand for anyone treating them with respect by anyone who would disrespect their child.
“Dad” doesn’t understand this.  He hasn’t done or said anything that could earn himself a place in my children’s lives.
But it’s okay.  Because he’s mentally and emotionally incapable of being a good parent or being respectful in the way a decent person does, so I’m done getting my panties in a bunch about it.
I did all my ranting about it already.  I even called him and left a voicemail because I wanted to tell him off.  But that’s never going to change anything.
I gotta grow up and move on sometime.  No time like the present.